BoxJam: Aw, crud! I forgot my card!

Doorman: Just show me a picture of your ratchet set.

BoxJam: Metric or English?

Doorman: Hmm ... 32 pieces ... I think I had one like that when I was single ...

Doorman: Describe the taste of "Sam Adams" ...

BoxJam: Like a dad can afford that - does it taste like Busch?

Doorman: Good answer. Two cycle or four cycle?

BoxJam: Umm ... My wife bought our lawnmower ...

Doorman: @?‡*$!! Why do you make my job so hard!? What Helen Hunt movie was on TNT last night?

BoxJam: Last night I sat plotting my strategy if one intruder tried to break into my boy's room at the same time as a fire starts, blocking the stairs.

[[Doorman motions for BoxJam to enter]]

Doorman: By the way, after you kill the intruder, throw his body out the window and use it as a cushion when you jump with the kids ...

BoxJam: Well, yeah ...