Minister: ... You are ten thousand times more abominable in His eyes than the serpent in ours...

Minister: ... That you did not go to Hell last night, that you was suffered to awake again in this world...

Minister: O sinner! Repent this very hour, for tomorrow may not find you on this Earth! Amen.

Minister: Couple of notes... Our women's club circle is having a pot luck this Tuesday... Please bring one non-dessert dish... And our youth group is sponsoring "game night" this Friday at 7 in the all-purpose room.

Ms. BoxJam: Do you think vegetarian "jello" salad counts as a dessert?

BoxJam: I wouldn't chance it...

Sign: This week: Jonathan Edwards guest sermon

{{idiot that I am, it didn't occur to me I needed to specify *which* Jonathan Edwards was the guest - I meant 18th century Puritan theologian Jonathan Edwards, not "Crossing Over" fakir Jonathan Edwards nor vice-presidential candidate John(athan?) Edwards}}